We got a letter in the mail here at our house....or I should say, D got a letter...from the DMV. S(hubby/father) opened it. It says that D's license has been revoked, for 6 mo.s, since June 7th ! Apparently, it's taken this long for the administrative process of the court to get this to happen...and let D/us know of it. On June 7th, D was convicted of a misdemeanor charge of possession of drug paraphernalia. If you've read this blog before, you know that it was a huge break for him...in that it was originally a felony charge of possession of a controlled substance(cocaine) and he was very fortunate to have it reduced to what it was, a misdemeanor charge of paraphernalia. However, from what we can decipher so far...from looking up the law code....in our state (VA.)...there is now a statute (I think that is what is what it is) that then automatically revokes the license of a drug convicted person for 6 mo.s...even if the drug offense had nothing to do with driving or didn't even occur in a vehicle ? This was pretty surprising to us(and to D), since he's had other prior drug offenses that didn't automatically revoke his license, nor did the judge (or D's attorney) ever mention anything about this the day he was in court and convicted. We e-mailed the attorney about this, haven't yet heard a reply about it...and of course, notified D right away.
Surprisingly....D, although not at all happy about this turn of events....stopped driving right away, despite needing to get back and forth from work 5 or 6 days per week, which he does by driving. In fact, after having relapsed in June, and not having driving privileges for 30 days...he's not yet even had his car back yet for 30 days. Meanwhile....I'm still (at least somewhat) thinking.....how's he going to work this out until early December ? How will he be able to keep getting rides from others for that long?...yada yada yada. I'm not as freaked out about it as I would have been in the past,...I have indeed made some progress in this journey, despite needing to still need so much more of it,..but still... I was actually somewhat flabbergasted that D wasn't upset, ...incessantly nagging about when would the attorney know or let us know if this is for sure....could anything be done to change it, etc.. But, truly...nothing. He's waiting, like we are, to just be doubly sure that this is not some glitch that is inaccurate (doubtful),..and is busy doing other daily things in the meantime, without AT ALL obsessing about it, and most of all,...NOT driving, nor whining about not driving. I couldn't help but say to him..."You seem to be pretty accepting of all of this...not having a hard time with it." His comment was, "Well, I'm just trying to accept life on life's terms" (AA/NA slogan) But still....geez,...I was quite amazed. Is this for real ? D's reaction to this ? Is he just lying about that? Still driving and telling me this ? ???? I know I could find out by calling his house manager...but I've controlled myself and didn't do that. We have done our best to impress upon him that if he did still drive, and there was (God forbid) an accident...insurance wouldn't cover him with a revoked license and all kinds of other trouble would follow.
I told my brother (one of D's most ardent and loving supporters,mind you)about it, and his comment was "Well,...if you walk around in dog shit long enough,...even when you're away from it....a long time later,..you look down and find out there's still a little shit on your shoe. It just takes so long to really get it all off." You'd have to know my brother....but he's quite a wonderful man and usually always has a witty comment....as well as the ability to make me smile/laugh in many of life's most troubling situations, thankfully.
So,what I'm saying here is that yes,...D still has some shit on his shoe,...despite his current efforts to not walk in shit anymore. And apparently....I do too,...for mine is the reaction to his reaction....in that it's hard to believe and fathom his reaction, as well as my mind wondering how he'll navigate all of this new challenge and keep his job, etc.. Is this making sense ? Time will tell....